Funny Anecdotes

A few short, funny experiences I've had my first week in China:

- A lot of little kids in China have holes in their pants so they can poop and pee as they please...in public. Usually they do it next to a tree but not always. Anyway, I was walking down the street exploring the surrounding neighborhoods of my campus when this little kid, probably about three years old, waltzed out of this storefront and proceeded to pee down the stairs of this store, practically right in front of me.

- I was walking around my campus when all of the sudden this Chinese kid rides up to me on his bike and says, "Excuse me, do you speak English?" Apparently, he wanted me to help him understand these documents which would allow his uncle to apply for citizenship in Canada. The language in the documents was such that was difficult for me to even understand the instructions on sending in the payment for applying. I told him his best bet was to e-mail the company to ask them the questions directly. I did notice there was a required Language Level Test that the documents mentioned. Later I thought, "If I don't know what this document is asking, and this kid couldn't understand the language in the documents, and his uncle had given it to him to take care of it for him, there is no way his uncle is going to become a Canadian citizen based on the Language Level Test."

- I ate "dark cat" the other day, it wasn't too bad.

- I walked around this corner only to see this little kid running wildly with what looked like to be a huge knife in his hand, screaming at the top of his lungs as he did so. It really looked like a real knife which slightly scared me, especially since it seemed like he was coming at me for a split second. So I just kept on walking and heard the kid fall behind me. I looked back and he seemed to be ok. I then walked by his dad (grandpa?) who wasn't paying him too much mind, so I figured it was probably a toy knife.

- Time does not really seem like any real object to the Chinese people. My contact (waiban) told me on Friday he needed to meet with me on Sunday to see the other side of campus (which is, confoundingly, half an hour away by shuttle) but he didn't give me an exact time to meet. So he called my room a little after 9 in the morning on Sunday, waking me up at, and told me to meet him in the lobby in 10 minutes. When he told us we have medical examinations this Tuesday, I made sure and ask him what time.

- Traffic = Chaos. In it's purest form. Buses and cars swerve in and out of their lanes, more often than not to avoid bicyclists who drift out of THEIR lanes. People are constantly honking to avoid accidents. The first honks I hear start around 6:00 or 6:30 in the morning and go on well into the evening. Taking a 15 minute taxi ride downtown, I thought we narrowly avoided 5 or so traffic accidents (and I'm pretty sure my taxi driver thought we narrowly avoided at least one). The honking doesn't bother me so much as people not bothering to change their brake pads on their vehicles or wax up their brakes on their bikes so you hear high pitched squeals at each intersection as traffic comes to a stop.

- I shaved my beard off

That's about all I think of for now. I'll post some pictures and shit soon enough. I start teaching a week from today!

- Josh

Smooth Arrival!!!

Despite traveling for over 24 hours, everything went smoothly. The most difficult part occurred when all I wanted to do was take a hot shower and I could not for the life of me figure it out. The shower water is filtered through this huge contraption and it's not even that complicated. There is really only lever that switches between various degrees of hot and cold. The thing is that you have to plug it in for a long time to warm the water (at least that's what I'm assuming now). In any case, I kind of took a shower without standing in the shower if you can imagine how ridiculous that looked. Other than that my apartment is nice and fairly large (at least by Chinese standards).

On another note, Chinese food has been great. Pork and beef dumblings and an amalgam of other things.

My foreign affairs office contacts have been incredibly hospitable and helpful and they showed me around campus and the surrounding area today. One of them goes by the name Sam.

Once I get more settled in, I swear I will have more interesting posts than this.

- Josh