Updates...

- My friend Angela had been wanting to find a Chinese phrase that is the equivalent to "Who do you think you're talking to?" It is kind of a long story explaining why we wanted to learn this phrase. If you want the story, it is below, but if not, you can skip the next paragraph.

In the Lost in Translation DVD, they go behind the scenes while filming. Bill Murray has a phrase book entitled "Making Out in Japanese" that is for people who are college-age. The only Japanese Bill Murray learns is the phrase "Who do you think you're talking to? Eh? Eh?" Which he aggressively, but jokingly, says to all the Japanese workers on the set.

The other night, while talking to our Scottish friend, Daniel, he told us that a phrase he uses when people are staring at him is "What do you think you are looking at?" It is phonetically pronounced "Khan shuh-ma khan." I haven't used it in public yet (I am waiting for a group of teenagers to stare at me) I have been using it around Chinese people I know. I walked into my class the next day and everyone became quiet and looked at me like they always do. So I looked back at them, squinted my eyes and said, "Kan sheme kan? Eh? Eh?" and then the entire class erupted in laughter.

My students love when I speak Chinese. They think it's the funniest thing in the world. Not that my pronunciation is that bad (well...maybe), but they just think it's funny to hear foreigners speak their language.

- We've been hanging out with a lot of the other foreigners recently. One that just arrived is a Scot named Mike.
When I introduced myself I said, "Hi, my name is Josh."
He said, "My name is MAKE!"
I said, "Mike?!"
He said, "MAKE!"

Supposedly, he is teaching English, but by the way he talks, I have no idea how the students understand him. I can only imagine the twisted and confused expressions on their faces as he talks about how rugby splayers are all "wankas" or how politics is "complete shite." I think the English department at his school collectively put their heads in their hands when they met him face to face.

- There is a bar not far from my campus that we affectionately call the "Foreigner Bar" or the "McDonald's Bar" (being next door to McDonald's). Last night I brought out these two Norwegians, Hanna and Bjorn (and yes, Colin, I talked about black metal with them), and told them it was the Foreigner Bar. Lo and behold, we walk into the bar, the only people there are all the Drake people and many of the foreign teachers as well. Bjorn exclaimed, "This IS the foreigner bar!" Bjorn and Hanna are very soft spoken and a little reserved but they had fun. Especially with all the obnoxious U.K. people yelling out lines from Braveheart (making fun of Mike) or having a dancing competition in the middle of the bar. At the end of the night, they asked, "Are we going out again tomorrow night?" haha.

- I have one really obnoxious student who calls himself Larry. He was looking at this practice test for English students. I'm not sure, but I think it was the final test for English major seniors. He wanted me to fill out portions of it and I refused saying, "I'm not going to do your homework for you". But then he insisted that there was an answer key in the back and he just wanted to see how well I could do on one section of it. He claimed one of his professors said that even native English speakers do poorly on this section. He made a bet with me: if I got 18 out of the 25 questions right he was going to buy me lunch. How could I refuse? I must say that some of the parts had to be grammatically incorrect, but I ended up just missing one. He put his head on his table in defeat and said, "I owe you lunch!"

-This next week is another Chinese holiday so we get the entire week off. We are going to Inner Mongolia (which is considered a province of China). Maybe we will ride horses on the great plains of Mongolia? All I know is that it's going to be really cold and Mongolians drink a lot.


The end of this post will be dedicated to all the crazy things that my students and other Chinese say to me. So check back regularly:

"Mr. Gaston, call of nature." - my student T.T., it took me a minute but I started laughing before he left to go to the bathroom